It’s 7am, I’m hungover AF but I’m up early to play. Problem is I can hear Malcolm McDowell announcing in his epic voice that I’ve fallen into a game hole. Yes, I’m appropriating Amazon Fire TV’s slogan because that’s exactly what it’s like.
I’ve scoured Game Pass and PlayStation Plus for that next fix that won’t cost as much as a filling up my tank these days. Or as much as my co-pay to see my PCP. Wait…would purchasing a new game be a valid expense on my HSA card? 🤔 I mean it is definitely a mental health thing for me. Otherwise I have to dwell on the fact that I’ve got some scary medical procedures coming up (turning 50 is a bitch) and the fact that it’s February and I’m waiting for PTSD to punch me in the gut or the fact that I’ve never been able to listen to my own thoughts without running for some kind of coping mechanism and gaming is far healthier than the other coping mechanisms I’ve chosen in the past. Sorry. I’m rambling. And yes, I know that was totally a run on sentence.
I mean it’s gotten so bad I replayed the original Plants vs Zombies on XBox. But I burned through that in about 8 hours. That includes meal and bathroom breaks. So yeah, WTF am I supposed to do now? Sit around and spend time with my family? C’mon be serious. Lol, kidding. And actually gaming is how me and my family spend time together so there…stop judging me 😂
I could replay one of the titles I love, but we all know that doesn’t provide the adrenaline and dopamine hit I’m craving. All the new and cool games I’m looking forward to on Game Pass are weeks or months away. I can’t afford the titles I want to buy. Okay, I can afford them, but there’s that whole pesky saving for retirement thing.
As I write this post I’m literally scrolling through. I’ve gotten all the way down to the W’s without finding something I’ve either already played or have no desire to try. I’m considering a couple out of sheer desperation The Wolfenstein titles might be fun. And there’s Weird West which looks right up my alley, bit the POV in the game is just odd. Too far away and sort of an over the top. Have I mentioned how much I hate the over the top POV? Why do devs ever choose it? It’s not how we see the world. How am I supposed to immerse myself in a world when I feel so separated from it? Seriously! Thus endeth the rant.
I suppose I’ll find some way to pass the time until Wo Long: Fallen Dynasty releases (OMG, soooo looking forward to that game, March 2nd, son…oh yeah!). And who knows, maybe I’ll find another masterpiece like the ones I wrote about last week. Most likely I’ll slog through something that leaves me feeling tepid about it at best. But that’s what gamers do. We play because we love playing. We are persistently optimistic. And gaming is like pizza or sex: when it’s good it’s so very f@#king good and when it’s bad…it’s still pretty damn good.
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When a Gamer Girl Grows up 